Gentle Media

“We’re living in unprecedented times.”  That feels like the phrase of my entire life. As a millennial, I’ve lived through more “unprecedented” things than generations before me. I was in 2nd grade when 9/11 happened. I was in 8th grade during the 2008 crash and I remember even my grandparents, who never talked about money, mentioning it. I had just graduated college when Trump was elected the first time. I was 26 when we had a global pandemic. I’m 32 now, and seeing constant news cycles that feel “unprecedented.”

I know my experience isn’t unique, as all of my peers have lived through the same things. And despite this shared experience by my generation, I feel like new movies and TV shows aren’t made for my experience. It feels like much of the new content coming out is explosive, and filled with violence.

A few years ago I wrote a post about Tik Tok/short form video and the effect I’d thought it would have of feature length films. At that time, short form media was still relatively new.  I wrote about how I thought the faster pace of media would reduce attention spans and either lead to shorter movies, or more likely, movies with lots of action or faster pacing to keep people’s attention.  And from the majority of films nominated for Best Picture this year at the Oscars it seems those predictions have been proved to be true.

But with the world moving so fast all the time, and with the constant news cycle, I spend a lot of time feeling uncomfortable.  Whether that feeling is from personal or professional stress, or from tragedies happening near me and around the world, it’s drawing me into hobbies, friendships, and media that make me feel comfortable. I’m finding myself drawn to what I’m starting to call “gentle media.” This encompasses movies, TV shows, podcasts and books that have a slower pace, are filled with more positivity or predictability, and leave me feeling comfortable.

What makes a movie or TV show “gentle media”?  It can be a number of things, and it’s likely a little different for each person. For me, it could simply be about the pace of the movie. I just watched Hamnet and while the story is sad, and the characters experience heartbreaking loss, the pace of the movie is delightfully slow.  It could also be about the intensity of the story and what happens to the characters. Crazy Rich Asians is a great example.  There are mean people in the movie, but there’s also so much humor and kindness and the stakes aren’t very high.  Action movies aren’t really my thing, but when I think of Oceans Eleven even that has a sense of “gentle” because they don’t complete the heist through force, but through smarts.  For some people, “gentle” movies could be Guardians of the Galaxy because of the nostalgia and humor, or How to Train Your Dragon because of the soundtrack.  For others it could be The Lord of the Rings, which is more intense, but still provides comfort because they know the good guys win in the end.

When I think about TV shows that I would call “gentle,” it’s because nothing really bad ever happens to the characters. Do they have struggles, sure, but do I know each episode will end with things resolved, yes.  Great examples of this include Friends, Big Bang Theory, The Office, Parks & Rec, Schitt’s Creek, and Ted Lasso. These are shows that have characters you begin to love over time, and plot lines that will keep you laughing.

“Gentle media” can also include reality TV. For me, I immediately think of The Great British Bake Off and how the contestants are so kind to each other, often helping each other with their bakes.  They give me hope in humanity.  For others, maybe it’s Love is Blind because it gives you hope in love not built on physical appearance, or American Idol or Dancing with the Stars because you love to root for someone.

I don’t listen to a lot of podcasts, but one that immediately gave me that feeling of comfort was Good Hang with Amy Poehler. It’s fun, carefree, and tender.  I love how Amy can laugh with every single one of her guests.  Amy facilitates such interesting conversations while respecting personal boundaries, privacy, and keeping her guests comfortable.  When I compare Amy’s conversations with celebrities to daytime or late night talk hosts over the years, you can see how Amy brings a respect and kindness that perhaps hasn’t always existed.  It’s such a fun podcast to listen to because you truly don’t know what direction a conversation will take.  Let me know your comfort podcasts as well!

And of course, we can’t talk about media without mentioning books. There are thousands and thousands of comfort books, so it’s hard to even name a few. But I think for most of us a book feeling “gentle” might be because we’re read it when we were young.  Anne of Green Gables, and The Secret Garden immediately come to mind when I think of comfort books. I also think back to the first time I read Ella Enchanted, and how I didn’t know what would happen, but I wanted Ella to break the curse so badly. The adventure of it probably wasn’t “gentle” when I was a kid, but it certainly is now.

If you’ve made it this far, I hope you have a sense of what I mean when I say “gentle media.”  Even better if you’ve already started compiling a list in your head of the movies, TV shows, podcasts, and books that feel “gentle” to you.

The world can be a hard place sometimes. There can be too much hate, too much change, and too much unknown. So don’t let anyone make you feel bad for re-watching your favorite show, or re-visiting a book you loved when you were younger.  You weren’t meant to only consume new and novel things.  Sometimes it’s ok to enjoy what feels “gentle.”